He came up short

Every year it happens. I have a birthday. Since I was a child the occasion had always been celebrated in the same grand-style: sunshine, swimming, friends, strawberries, cake, surprises and of course presents. And I love presents. Luckily I loved everything I got, well almost.

My IT guy surprised me that day. First, by showing up and staying at my entire birthday. Second, by presenting me with a little purple wrapped box. Imagine my surprise (and my facial expression) when I opened the box to find a pair of high waisted white Bermuda shorts.

One after another my girlfriends made their comments on the shorts and their transferrable meaning on our relationship:

Maria: Yikes! It's over. Two words: "Return Policy."
Carrie: I'm just not sure why the shorts! I mean it's so not you. He obviously doesn't know you.
Sandy: Maybe we could get some get some glitter gel and jazz them up a bit.
Marianne: I don't like this gift and I don't like him.
Diana: You're going to think about this gift for the rest of your life, it's going to be legendary.
Martha: Oh, that's not good.

...but my most optimistic friend, Anna pushed me into the washroom, "try them on," she coaxed, "you might be surprised."
I stepped out of the washroom dawning the shorts and frown. "I guess not," she said.

I think it's over between me and my IT guy and it's not the gift. I think overall, when it comes to being a leading man in my life, he just comes up short.