The thing I hate most is when people misuse words, particularly words with weight. Those phrases and words that hit you in the bottom of your stomach like your little brother just punched you "as hard as he can" or the words that travel like a fluttering butterfly from your stomach to your mouth, making you giddy. I hate it when people misuse these words because I love those far too rare feelings.
So when a pathetic whiny boy tells me he loves me and then does nothing, says nothing to follow it up, I realize I have a case of misused words on my hands. Instead of grieving and feeling pathetically low about the fact that I have given my heart to someone incapable of understanding what being in love means - I file it away under "past pain" and decide to play the field. Why should I feel badly about our relationship a second time?
Despite words like "I kinda miss you some" when added together do not denote the quantity of cute intended by their user but instead come to mean I miss you a tiny pinch, almost none at all, I push forward, with a new plan for my romantic future in hand. No more tedious phone calls about ex-girlfriends, no more late night rendez-vous, no more pathetic whining and most importantly no more degrading myself by chasing after a boy who doesn't really want me. That was so something I'd do when I was seventeen. Now I'm older and wiser and know that I only want to be with guys who realize they want me and treat me as such.
Thus, I'm playing the field with a double header first date lined up for Saturday and Sunday. I'll let you know how they go. I'm quite excited to finally let go of all the baggage that came with high-school ex and possibly catch something worthwhile. I'm positively giddy.
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